Moviejawn

View Original

Tommy C. Appreciation Club: THE MUMMY (2017)

Directed by Alex Kurtzman
Written by David Koepp, Christopher McQuarrie, Dylan Kussman, Jon Spaihts, Alex Kurtzman and Jenny Lumet
Starring Tom Cruise, Sofia Boutella, Annabelle Wallis and Russell Crowe
Running time 1 hour and 50 minutes

MPAA Rating PG-13 for partial nudity, action and scary images, suggestive content and violence

by Ryan Silberstein, Ashley Jane Davis, Hunter Bush, Katie McBrown and Rosalie Kicks 

The Tommy C. Appreciation Club, or TCAC, solemnly swears to watch and appreciate all theatrical performances by Tom Cruise then recap them, round-table style. In this edition, the Moviejawn crew dissects Tommy’s unforgettable hammy performance in The Mummy (2017). 

Ryan Silberstein:

Leading this off makes me feel like a lamb being led to the slaughter, because I am one of the few people who thinks this movie is awesome. Not necessarily good, but awesome. Revisiting it for this Tommy C. Club was at least the third time that I’ve seen it, and my opinion remains the same. So let me count down what I like about this. 

First, Tom Cruise basically directed this movie. Kurtzman is credited, but the word is that Cruise basically ran this production and called the shots. That’s just cool. And his performance here is reminiscent of the cocky, unfeeling coward of Edge of Tomorrow (aka Live Die Repeat), which is still not the typical Cruise character. For once it feels like he’s in over his head rather than having nerves of steel, and the film more or less retains his moral ambiguity, which is rare for a blockbuster.

Secondly, I like that this is a new story that falls squarely in the mummy genre, but isn’t a remake of any of the nine previous Mummy movies. It’s doing its own thing, and I have to respect that. There’s familiar stuff from other films, like trapped tombs, curses, a sandstorm with a big mummy face (and Tom Cruise running from a sandstorm), but it sets much of the film in around London. The scenes set at the church remind me of Carfax Abbey from Dracula, which also feeds into the whole Dark Universe thing, which I’ll get to in a moment. Jake Johnson’s performance, and his relationship with Cruise’s character is also really fun, and the fact that he is haunted is cool. 

Thirdly, and finally, the Dark Universe idea is cool. Yes, it’s silly, but that’s what makes it cool. Russell Crowe’s performance as the burly Jekyll and Hyde should have become iconic. Crowe is clearly having fun with it, putting his energy and physique to good use in portraying the struggling doctor. It was a fun attempt at connective tissue, and I’m sad we didn’t get more of this ridiculous concept. All I’m saying is that sometimes it takes a monster to fight a monster.

Ashley Jane Davis:

I totally believe that art is subjective, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. That being said, I hate The Mummy. While we watched it, my sweetheart commented “This should just be called ‘The Gross’”. I echo her sentiments. I don’t care about the work Tommy put into it because I just don’t like it. 

Ryan, you are right–it is doing its own thing. I don’t like the thing it is doing, but I hear you, and I agree with you! To be honest, my biggest issue with all of this, Dark Universe included, could be summed up in one word: action. I have seen all 30 of the original Universal Classic Monster movies made from the 1930s into the 1950s. I really love those monsters - the monsters, as real living (err) breathing (I think?) creatures are amazing. However, as the sequels piled up and the studio felt a need to make crossover movies (sigh - why would Dracula ever need to fight The Wolf Man?), they lost me.

I mean, I get why they are made. Money. Lots of people like it and that’s fine. But, the more we get away from the gothic horror elements and into the “fun action” concepts, the less I want to be a part of it. That’s why this Dark Universe business never appealed to me. There are enough superhero movies and shared universes out there - can we keep the monsters out of it? And let them live in their spooky castles or foggy graveyards n shit? I want my monster movies to be slow-moving, brooding and atmospheric, not action-packed adventure romps. I’d rather this movie be some generic Tommy C. action thing because then I would know to avoid it. But ya dangle that MONSTER carrot and well, here we are… (I just imagined Tommy C. as The Mummy grinning and saying a stupid one-liner to Frankenstein’s monster and hurled.)

Hunter Bush:
I fall somewhere in between you two. Intellectually, I am all for the Dark Universe. To Ryan’s point - the silliness is a huge part of my interest! If you can’t or won’t just do nice, austere, single film series of monster flicks with their own complete, enclosed stories, then absolutely go full-on rollercoaster nonsense with it. BUT. It’s gotta have the horror. Tommy’s Mummy leans a bit too hard on the action pedigree that TC has built up while delivering pretty much no monster movie scares or atmosphere, really.

I understand the decision to make an “action Mummy”, with Tom Cruise as the poster boy and I am also ALL FOR genre-mixing. Fuck yes. Please do! But you have to do as well by each one you’re mixing as you do by the other. You can’t just make something that’s 80% well-made action balanced with what amounts to some half-assed horror wallpaper. 

Crowe was really giving it a go, and I am here for it, but SO MUCH of this Mummy - or “Mission: Imhotep-able” if you will - just seems like arbitrary decisions made at a break-neck pace so they could fast-track their universe, with no actual care made to the KIND of universe they supposedly wanted to build. But hey. That’s been the DC Films formula, so maybe if we can gather enough whiny crybaby sewer-dwelling manchildren to spread a #ReleaseTheCruiseCut hashtag, we can start a movement that ends with a $100 million do-over that we’ll all pretend was “the true vision all along”.

Please come back to me, I would like to say nice things as well. 

Katie McBrown

I’m entering the chat completely unarmed and without a lot of knowledge about the Dark Universe. Before watching this Tom Cruise slop, I had never seen any of the Brendan Fraser Mummy flicks so I watched this without any prior Mummy’s in my arsenal. I’m typically easy to please with big action flicks. I go in with low expectations and leave with a popcorn hangover having enjoyed a scene or two. I came into this movie with no expectations whatsoever but perked up a little when I saw Nick from New Girl aka Jake Johnson and enjoyed that he became a zombie. I like zombs. 

You could really tell that this was a Tom-centric movie not only in screen time but in who was handling what. I felt his presence everywhere and man I wasn’t wrong. After viewing I read a few articles about how he had total control over the script, production, post production and release details. Dude sometimes it’s best to let other people be in control. Stick to your witty one liners and ability to perform stunts, young man. 

Rosalie Kicks, Old Sport: 

The Mummy is one of those flicks that I don’t ever want to forget, because I don’t ever want to make the mistake of accidentally watching it again. This is an unholy mess of a film and falls in the Hollywood genre of: what in the actual fuck.

I had the displeasure of witnessing this “film” for the first time on the big screen and I recall leaving the theater extremely agitated. As I walked up the cinema aisle towards the exit, I knocked over senior citizens, women and children as I had to desperately get away from the film. I needed whiskey. Seeing the “Dark Universe” logo hit the silver screen for the first time, made me think about ending things. I had a feeling of not just distaste but utter embarrassment for whomever thought this was something that should be taken seriously. All I see now when I look at the logo is: Dork Universe.

Frankly, to enjoy this movie is to be out of your mind (sorry, but not sorry, Ry). This is not the first time I will come to question The Red Herring’s cinematic taste and I am sure it will not be the last. Sure, I enjoy Tommy’s hammy acting, wild grins and running but I prefer for him to stay in his own lane. Tommy tried to turn my beloved monsters into an action packed expedition in the name of antiquities. NO. 

I couldn't agree more with Ashley Jane’s sentiments a few paragraphs above… I want my monster pals to be brooding. I want fog and atmospheric lighting. Most importantly I don’t want action stars. For me, Tom Cruise committed a violent crime with the production of this film. My eyes shall never recover from the horror that was witnessed. The day that the offices of the Dark Universe were shuddered should be deemed a national holiday in which everyone has the day off and celebrates with copious amounts of cake. 

This film is nonsense which is why I shall be taking the copy that Ryan unfortunately purchased for me and burying it deep underground in a sarcophagus. I fear though that if a weary traveler stumbled upon it they would mistake it for a rare antiquity which is why it must be permanently destroyed.