Do You Want To Kill A Snowman 2: more Christmas movies, hold the cheer
by A. Freedman, Staff Writer
This has turned into one of my favorite holiday tradition: compiling a list of alternate Christmas watches for when Love Actually, or even Die Hard (at this point) have gotten old. Enjoy my list from last year at the old Cinema76, which also has links to previous lists. Without further ado, a selection of action/horror/sci-fi Christmas movies ranging from the classic to the ill-advised to the "how did this get made?"
Deadly Games (dir. Rene Manzor, 1989)
Watch on Shudder
A movie with several alternate titles (Dial Code Santa Claus, Game Over, etc.) that has been rediscovered over the last few years, Deadly Games is a true Christmas gem. This bizarre (or is it just French?) Christmas Eve home invasion thriller where a Rambo-loving child defends his home against a deranged and violent Santa Claus shares more than a little DNA with a film that would come out a year later, Home Alone. Imagine that Home Alone was a weird, fever dream art film that takes place in a snowglobe (or again...is it just French?) and you've got something like Deadly Games.
Elves (dir. Jeff Mandel. 1989)
Watch on YouTube
This is a movie that has no real business existing, but I am thankful that it does. If it didn't, you wouldn't have a movie about a Nazi experiment involving the breeding of Elves to become some kind of a super race, and a very chill and nice Mall Santa (played by Dan Haggerty, aka Grizzly Adams) who comes to save the day. I had been dying to see this ever since I heard about it on a Filmspotting interview with Rob Hill (Bad Movie Bible), and it delivered. Still, nothing could prepare me for the moment when they unironically crib one of the most famous plot twists in movie history. My jaw hit the floor. (PS. I usually wouldn't advise that someone seek out a movie for free on YouTube, but this is basically a lost film by now- so this VHS rip uploaded to YouTube in glorious 480p is the best you can do. I say go for it!)
Hold The Dark (dir. Jeremy Saulnier, 2016)
Watch on Netflix
Freezing cold tundras and snow-laden forests are the background of just about every scene in Jeremy Saulnier's brutal and underseen Hold The Dark. Set in Alaska, Christmas is once again mostly in the background, but serves the themes of family, or "packs," and what families will do to each other–especially the weakest and most vulnerable among them–in order to survive. I watched this not long after the January 6th insurrection and found it quite appropriate. A story of the dark void of violence, just a rippling tide of frozen grief that swallows whatever it touches. Yet out of all the movies on this list, Hold The Dark leaves room for a surprising moment of Christmas cheer. May we be happy once again- in our packs.
Lethal Weapon (dir. Richard Donner. `1987)
Watch on HBOMax
Shane Black loves setting his films around Christmas time, so you can pretty much pick any one of the writer/director's filmography around this time of year. But with the recent passing of Richard Donner, why not go back to the script that first made him one of the most in demand screenwriters in Hollywood? Christmas is merely a background to this most essential buddy action flick, but in the end it plays into the theme of chosen family, and how the wild and dangerous Riggs gets sort of adopted by the stable, loving Murtaugh family- just in time for the holidays.
Trancers (dir. Charles Band, 1984)
Watch on TubiTV
Jack Deth is a cop who travels back in time hundreds of years by inhabiting the body of an ancestor...to 1984, in order to stop a nemesis who turns people into zombies? Called "Trancers?" Look, it's not great, but there is a scene of Deth getting into a knockout brawl with a Mall Santa who turns out to be one of these titular bad guys. Oh, and a young Helen Hunt is in it! And there are six (6) sequels? All I know is, Charles Band, you crazy.